Communication is what makes us human: More tips for thinking, writing and speaking in a world of quicksand communications

71. Own it when you mess it.	71. Everyone makes mistakes. Clean up your errors as soon as you can. “How can I make this better?” are words that can move us forward. When you’re deep in a ditch, getting out is the first priority. Focus your mind and words on fixing, not fixating on what happened or why.
72. Let it go, Louie.	“But, I was right, and this is so unfair!”  Ah, the wisdom in a beer TV ad remains true decades after the campaign first aired. Learn to recognize the stubborn tendency to focus on how we have been wronged or singled out for some injustice. It’s over and what we do next is what matters now. It must be wiring we acquired in the jungle or caves. Fortunately we now have Zumba and TV sports to release our primitive responses.
73. Entitlement wears many disguises.	La zorra nunca se ve su cola. The fox never sees its own tail. We are excused when we don’t notice our own entitlements of gender, race, age, class, education or citizenship. We are so used to them they are nearly invisible. We are not excused, however, to believe they don’t exist. They do. Understanding differences is the first step to allowing for differences and expanding our views and experience.
74. Hold the critic, thanks!	Judging has its place in a courtroom or a rodeo arena. Regular folks don’t need to live under the threat of a constant conviction or red flag. The tension of always feeling judged by yourself or others, usually imaginary, is draining and damaging. Tama Keives said it best: “It was just easier to fight for myself when I wasn’t fighting with myself.”
75. Where are your limits?	My sister, Elda Bielanski, won the Chopped television show ten thousand dollar prize in 2014 by pressing forward and challenging herself, an amateur, to compete with trained chefs. Her courage in training and studying leading up to the competition and on the show was fueled by a belief in herself that did not allow for self-limiting questions or doubts. Do any of us have so much extra life that we can waste our energy on doubts and self censorship?

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